Remember when Singh was King? Well
now we all know he is not!! However this time he is not even the more famous
silent helpless, caught in the web Singh. This Singh outing is a tryst with the
ludicrously asinine with not a tangential moment of sanity. Bereft of any
sensitivity or respect to the intelligence of the viewer even assuming the
audience in its collective have left their grey cells behind and have walked in
at their own risk. One may well maintain that Prabhu Deva’s name in the credit
titles is caveat enough!! The guy surpasses himself. Yes he proves that it is
possible and the abyss is immeasurable. Will someone please, please tell the
supple footed dancer wonder to stick to the art he is familiar with.
Meant to be a comedy or pretentiously designed to be one, it is on you laugh at
though the joke is on you. 141 minutes of crazy insanity – loud in every
aspect: colour music sound, dress, emotions and tiring to a fault. It does not
test your intelligence it questions it and insults it beyond repair. Anyone who
defines this product as entertainment needs immediate medical attention and
could well be a psychiatrist’s challenge.
There is this without a cause boisterous village somewhere in Punjab where the
decibel levels must be the highest on the planet. There is the family headed by
Papa Stern (Yograj Singh) and Mama Soft (Rati Agnihotri) who together have
imposed one huge mistake in a hurry and have even named him speed: Raftar Singh
(Akshay) who is actually Rough tear. He is that proverbial good for nothing who
has a team of morons backing him up. Papa Stern is trying to correct him and
Mama Soft is always feeding him. You have uncles, aunts, cousins and forms of
needless nuisance employed to satisfy some employment stats. After being good
for nothing for long just at the time when you decide to have a good afternoon
at the multiplex, Papa Stern packs Raftaar to Goa to the tutelage of Kirpal
Singh (Pradeep Rawat). Cut and move to Romania. Why? That is one question you
will never ask in the 141 minutes except when you kick yourself for not asking
the same before you got yourself the ticket. In Romania – the centre for all
the bad guys, we have Marc (Kay Kay Menon) who obviously was blackmailed into
accepting this role. Marc is insulted by Lady Kung Fu Sarah (Amy Jackson). Marc
does Dad off and threatens matrimony with Lady Kung Fu who instead of staying
back and using her skill sets on the guy moves to Goa where our Kirpal is any
way running an asylum. Mr. Speed meets Ms Kung Fu. Since language is a barrier
they get in Ms. Konky – translator Emily (Lara Dutta – bespectacled and
behaving like Sushmita Mukherjee gone wrong).
OK when Ms. Kung Fu is not beating up the local baddies or waiting for
international baddy, she is searching for lost Mamma who dad (Kunal Kapoor
looking like the fattest Kapoor on the planet) had left for some reason. Now as
Prabhu Deva knits together his colourful tapestry and ends up with a garish
quilt, you have also songs which say things like Chu chaa chin cha….. This
Southern Spice with Punjabi Tadka is a recipe for disaster.
At the end of the film you have a Punjabi newspaper shot thrown at you. Yes you
cannot read a word of it or decipher what it is all about. Soo symbolic of the
film!!
Rating: 1 star
_ Loud and dismal humour
+ Ever reliable Akshay Kumar.
L. Ravichander.